I've been off Facebook and Twitter for several months until very recently and have kept it at a minimum since returning. These longer breaks have been much needed for me and God is always faithful to teach me a lot during extended fasts. It is easy to get caught up in the dopamine rush that it can bring, especially if you have passionate opinions (which I do.) It is easy to ignore the emotions and thoughts I need to deal with when I can run to scrolling anytime I have a spare quiet moment. It also helps me to realize how much time I'm wasting there and get back to connecting in real life and getting things done in the real world. Stepping away for long enough that I recognize the ways I may be filling voids with something besides Christ is critical for my spiritual health. Stepping back in to social media space in the middle of a worldwide pandemic has been, umm... startling, to say the least.
I read a book last year, Love Over Fear. I have recommended it to so many people and I'll keep recommending it. It is incredibly timely for the day and age we're living in. Since then, I have been reassessing everything about how I interact with others, both on and offline, and this reassessment continued and deepened during my social media break. If we're going to be interacting with people we disagree with, we have to learn to do it in a way that reflects Jesus. (If we're not interacting with people different from us in positive, authentic, friendship-building ways then that is a whole other set of problems and another blog post entirely.)
As Christ followers, we should be known for our love for all people. We should be characterized as truth-tellers. No matter where we sit on the theological spectrum, these are (or at least should be) non-negotiables for people of faith. The balance of this post is mostly things I have learned about myself and how I need to monitor myself on social media as well as things I've observed since rejoining Facebook during such a volatile time.
I read a book last year, Love Over Fear. I have recommended it to so many people and I'll keep recommending it. It is incredibly timely for the day and age we're living in. Since then, I have been reassessing everything about how I interact with others, both on and offline, and this reassessment continued and deepened during my social media break. If we're going to be interacting with people we disagree with, we have to learn to do it in a way that reflects Jesus. (If we're not interacting with people different from us in positive, authentic, friendship-building ways then that is a whole other set of problems and another blog post entirely.)
As Christ followers, we should be known for our love for all people. We should be characterized as truth-tellers. No matter where we sit on the theological spectrum, these are (or at least should be) non-negotiables for people of faith. The balance of this post is mostly things I have learned about myself and how I need to monitor myself on social media as well as things I've observed since rejoining Facebook during such a volatile time.
If we share/post/say something that is inaccurate, or is an outright lie, even if it's someone else's words we're sharing, and even if we didn't know at the time we posted it, shared it or said it, we are responsible for spreading lies. I've lost count of how many times I've seen something along the lines of, "even if they didn't really say this, they easily could have, so I don't regret it and I'm not taking it down." Every single person I've seen say something like this also openly confesses to be Christian. Somewhere along the way, we've decided it's okay to slander someone (though we'll not use that word) if we think their politics or theology is vile enough. I am so burdened by how lightly we will claim Christ out of one side of our mouth and justify slandering an "enemy" from the other side.
Honestly, as I've grappled with this tendency online, I have found such ugliness within my own heart. I may not call someone ugly names or slander them outwardly, but I've harbored deep, resentful feelings toward others. I've had to deal with a heart that was willing to hold on to deep-seated animosity. Rather than consistently praying for healing and hoping for the best for "the other," I found myself finding some pleasure in public failures. Rather than praying they would be delivered from the darkness that holds them, I simply settled into my feelings of complete disregard.
We have been tasked by the One who called us to be salt and light in this world. We should be adding goodness and grace. Above all other people, Christ-followers should be extraordinarily careful that what we say and share, as well as what we harbor in our hearts, bring truth AND love. If we think what we allow to simmer under the surface will not effect our actions and behaviors, we need to revisit the teaching of Jesus.
Honestly, as I've grappled with this tendency online, I have found such ugliness within my own heart. I may not call someone ugly names or slander them outwardly, but I've harbored deep, resentful feelings toward others. I've had to deal with a heart that was willing to hold on to deep-seated animosity. Rather than consistently praying for healing and hoping for the best for "the other," I found myself finding some pleasure in public failures. Rather than praying they would be delivered from the darkness that holds them, I simply settled into my feelings of complete disregard.
We have been tasked by the One who called us to be salt and light in this world. We should be adding goodness and grace. Above all other people, Christ-followers should be extraordinarily careful that what we say and share, as well as what we harbor in our hearts, bring truth AND love. If we think what we allow to simmer under the surface will not effect our actions and behaviors, we need to revisit the teaching of Jesus.
One of my commitments in online engagement is that if I don't have time to fact check a story or a meme, then it follows that I don't have time to post it. Far too many mistakes are made and people hurt in a rush to "be right". I also try to be thoughtful about any memes I post. Are they passive-aggressive ways of attacking someone else? If so, I want to commit to not adding to the ugliness. If I wouldn't say it sitting face-to-face with an actual person that I disagree with, then my prayer is I won't blast it in a meme.
If I find out later what I've posted or said was untrue or slanted to the point of being largely untrue and inflammatory, I need to step up, admit it, apologize for any problems I may have contributed to in my rush to speak and then make amends as best I can. (I can tell you, this commitment to myself has greatly increased my consistency to track my sources before I say anything.)
If I cannot call out wrong without broad stereotyping or name-calling, if I cannot make my political or theological point AND show love, it's not time for me to make my point. If I am not truly willing to engage in a way that is open-ended, willing to listen, willing even to be wrong, then it is not time for me to make my point. There is more than enough mud-slinging and one-sided opinion blasting to go around. It shouldn't be fueled by those that name the name of Christ. I told y'all a while back that my word for 2020 is Listen. I'm working hard on learning how to do that better. And I feel strongly that includes, maybe even especially, those I disagree with. I want to learn to ask earnest, honest questions and truly listen for answers. If I'm not ready to do that, I've determined to be quiet until I can.
Am I occasionally super frustrated that I'm remaining silent while all around me people are saying stupid, wrong-headed, unloving, sometimes completely immoral things? Yup. Have I ever regretted waiting? Not so far. There have been times, as I waited, I've learned my opinion was just flat wrong. There have been times I've learned from the person I was angry with. There have been times that I found wiser, less confrontational ways to engage. There have been times that remaining silent was the right answer. But I've never regretted waiting.
We must come to terms with the fact that a lie, even if we agree with it's premise, is still a lie.
A lie that "puts THOSE people in their place" is still. a. lie.
A lie that "puts THOSE people in their place" is still. a. lie.
We are people of love.
Social media is an utter disaster, many days, a full-fledged dumpster fire. We can be known as people that bring love, light and grace into this space, even when the conversations may be hard, even when we disagree from deep core values. We can be known for love or for pettiness and judgement, for light or for conspiracy theories and stone throwing, for engaging with grace or for shaming "the enemy". I'll tell you honestly, I fear we're too often known for the latter and it is not a good look.
I commonly hear, I'm assuming as some sort of justification for being "honest" (and I put this in quotes because nine times out of ten, that is code for being a jerk), that Jesus often had harsh words for people, called them names, overturned tables, etc. This seems to justify being awful to people or saying awful things about politicians or teachers we disagree with. If they're offended, well, then the truth is offensive... Or so the story goes. We can scale amazing heights to justify being unloving, but that is what it is - justification. I'll go there. Jesus's harshest words and actions were exclusively for the religious elite. His words for those outside His faith tradition, for those in the margins, for the poor and the vulnerable, were words of healing, grace, forgiveness, love.
Jesus endured great persecution, to the point of death, but never for a lack of love. A great deal of his critics, in fact, hated him FOR his love and friendship with "the other".
If I'm going to be maligned, let it be for loving too much.
Jesus endured great persecution, to the point of death, but never for a lack of love. A great deal of his critics, in fact, hated him FOR his love and friendship with "the other".
If I'm going to be maligned, let it be for loving too much.
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