So I Was Afraid

In Matthew 25, we hear Jesus tell a story.

A rich man is heading out on a long journey and he puts three of his servants in charge of his assets. To one he gives five "talents" (money); to another, two; and to another, one.  And off he goes.  When he returns some time later, he finds that the first two men have invested, and doubled, the assets left with them.  

The master responds to them both with, "Well done, good and faithful servant."

It's the third man bringing me here today.

He is afraid. 

Now remember -- the master trusted him - so he's clearly no dope.  The master saw potential. He saw what could be.  What did the man see?

He saw his potential for failure.  He saw his weakness.  He saw the perfection of his boss.

He was afraid.

He buried the money in a hole and did nothing.

I SO don't want to be that guy.

I see my potential for failure - and it's huge.  I see my weakness - it is great.  I see the enormity of the task.  I see the awesomeness, the perfection of my God.

I'm uncomfortable.

I'm afraid.

And I want to hide.   I want to procrastinate.  I want to continue to come up with reasons (read "excuses") for why I should just hide in a hole - at least I won't make anything worse there, right?

Wrong.

 

There is much that needs to be done - much He has entrusted to us - to me.  We are the agents He has chosen to use to bind up the broken, to heal, to rescue, to love this world and show them the love of a perfect, awesome Father.  And it will. get. worse. if we - if I, choose to hide in a hole and do nothing.

God is opening some doors just a crack to let me see some options - and y'all - I'm terrified at what lies behind every. one. of. them.

But I don't want to be that guy.

I don't want to be the guy, that at the end looks back at what could have been. 

I don't want to look back and just see a pile of dirt and an unused life.

Beginning Tonight

Beginning tonight,

my house will become messy again after I clean it,
I'll have to cook more,
the laundry will pile up faster,
my reading will consistently  be interrupted, to talk,
I will have to go to social events against my will,
I'll have to talk in the mornings...

I can. not. wait.

I have missed my man.

I have known he makes me a better person, but I realize afresh all the different ways that is true.

I'm ready for an evening around the firepit with friends - that includes my best friend.

Hurry home, Brian!

Tomorrow

Tomorrow.

This'll be short and to the point.

Brian and Dylan leave tomorrow for India with Steve Hollingsworth, of 4Him ministries.  Brian and Steve will be gone for 2 1/2 weeks.  Dylan for some extended time after that (not sure of his return date yet).

If you haven't been following this, they will be serving alongside an Indian pastor in Chennai that trains young pastors and then supports their work (teaching, encouraging, and helping them to be come self-sustaining) as they go back to their home villages, all over India - starting schools and, often, churches. Much of his work is with the Dalite people groups. They will be working with pastors, students, children and whoever else God brings in their path.

My heart is incredibly full today.  I'm SO proud of these two men in my life.  They are both reaching way outside of their comfort zones - doing what love does - what faith does.  Which is just that -- it DOES.

Please pray.

Pray they will be empty vessels, that God can pour Himself through.
Pray they will risk, and love, and give. Everyday.
Pray they will be a blessing and be blessed.
Pray they will both see and be light in the midst of great darkness.
Pray they will bring life lessons back to share with the Bodies they worship and serve with.
Pray they will be changed forever.
Pray for wisdom as they teach, learn from and invest in the lives of pastors, students, children.
Pray for their health - specifically 1. that the introduction of so many new germs, foods, etc. will not make them sick;  2. Dylan's depression - that it would be well managed and he would have clear thought and peace.
Pray they will be able to rest when it's time to rest - no matter the environment - and feel refreshed when it's time to work again.

I'm so excited for them.

I'm so freaked out.

But I am at peace.

Can't wait to see what God has in store.

Love Does